| Gold Tetsuo | |
|---|---|
 snesus (snail jesus) | |
|
Species |
Human |
|
Gender |
Male |
|
Age |
17 Earth Years |
|
Orientation |
Bisexual Biromantic, probably |
|
Blood Type |
B+ |
|
Color |
Gold |
|
Occupation |
Perfect A+ Precious Son |
|
Birthday |
July 21 |
He is Capable of being turned into accounts that usually would reacquire to be paid for and function as an actual gold account, please do not do this to him you bastard
We will know if you do that, we will know and find you
it will not be pleasant for you
It will be suffering and awful
this will be your only warning
Gold is the biggest fucking dork, I swear to god.
He is the owner of the titles of capitalized Babby and dork babby
He has lost almost all interest in consuming brownies again, and could live happy without eating another one in his life.
Anyone who tries to harm him or worsen his emotional state will be severely punished
He is a precious adorable beautiful dork child and he is loved very much
he deserves to be given cuddles and nice things, and does not deserve to be hurt or tortured
please be kind to him
do not hurt him or damage his self-esteem
let him feel good about himself
do nice things for him, let him be happy
treat him well
maybe tickle him sometimes
tickle wars with precious baby
jammin tuesday
Due to being Buddhist and not Snistian (snail christian) he cannot take full advantage of being Snesus, but that's 100% okay
he is a sweet cutie and loved very much
He is a lovable dork and a precious son
Cuddle him very much
give him nice things and treat him well
care for him
Gold is care our space and the entire fucking sun holy fuckign shit oh my god, and Silver is a cute little bee who no one is able to honestly say he isn't cute.
It is a Fact you could make a Medium to large sized pile of all of gold's t-shirts that he has. It is Debatable if you could make a small castle for small creatures and insects with the t-shirts. He keeps them all in his lower intestine, as he has digested very little to none at all food or food particles all since he has come back to life. It is a mystery how they are not creating any problems down there or how he doesn't seem to be in any pain from that. It is also a mystery how he continues to be alive and relatively unhindered whilst running on absolutely nothing. It Is a Mystery that he still has some deal of energy to do things while not really doing much to replenish that energy and that has not really started to take much of a toll on him quite yet. It probably will at some point though and there will be much pain to be had. Definitely, for now he gets to have just some of the milder variants and only suffer a little, before they do. May he enjoy that while it lasts.
a panda bear walks into a restaurant and orders some food. when the panda is finished eating, the waiter asks if they'd like anything else. the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter. the owner of the restaurant runs over yelling "why did you shoot my waiter?? he was my best waiter!" the panda replies, "i'm a panda bear, look it up in the dictionary," then leaves the restaurant. the owner looks up 'panda' in the dictionary and finds the definition: 'panda bear. eats shoots and leaves.'
10/10
How many steps does it take to put an elephant into a fridge?
Three: open the door, put the elephant in, close the door.
nice
How many does it take to put a giraffe in?
Four: open the door, take out the elephant, put the giraffe in, close the door.
I want to use the thumbs up emoticon for these but the computer does not have it, so imagine that is what I am doing right now as that is what I am.
The animals are having a meeting, which animal didn't come?
The giraffe, it's inside the fridge.
10/10
A plane has 500 windows. One falls, how many windows are left?
499.
An old woman wants to cross an alligator infested river. There's no boat or bridge, but she still walks across without being eaten. Why?
All the alligators are at the meeting.
10/10
Even though the woman gets across, she still dies, why?
The window hit her.
I like the interconnectivity of these too, another thumbs up.
Two chemists walk into a bar. The first one says "I'll have some H2O." The second one says "I'll have some water too. Wh... Why did you say H2O? I mean I get that it's the chemical formula of water but that was really unnecessary. We're not in the lab." The first chemist swears under his breath. His assassination plan had failed.
11/10
What do you call a short clairvoyant who just broke out of jail?
A small medium at large
11/10
Little Anne to her grandmother:
- "Grandma, I don't like grandpa."
- "It's fine. Eat only the potatoes."
It's really hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.
10/10
How do you catch a lion in three easy steps?
1. Take a sheet of paper and rip it into small bits.
2. Climb onto a tree.
3. When the lion walks under the tree, let the bits of paper float down. The lion will think it's snow, and freeze to death.
Nice
Two atoms are in a bar. One says, "I think I lost an electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" To which the other replies, "I'm positive."
also very nice joke 10/10
A photon walks into a hotel and asks for a room. The receptionist says, "Of course, and would you like someone to carry your luggage for you?" The photon says, "No, that's okay. I'm traveling light."
nnnnice
A priest, a rabbi, a duck, a blonde, a man with a 12" pianist, and a piece of string all walk into a bar together. The bartender looks up and says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"
10/10
Why did the car crash?
Because Jimmy was driving.
Why couldn't Jimmy drive?
Because he had no arms or legs.
Why didn't he have any arms or legs?
Because he was a potato.
nice also
Forget about the world
Hey there Gold
What's goin' on
AND I SAY HEYAAEYAAAEYAEYAAHEYEEYEA
I SAID HEY
WHATS GOING ON
AND HE TRIESSSSS
OH MY GOD DO I TRY
I TRY ALL THE TIME
IN THIS INSTITUTION
AAND HE PRAAAYSS
OH MY GOD DO I PRAY
I PRAY EVERY SINGLE DAY
FOR A REVOLUTION
Gold has now been nominated for the prestigious award of "MC Most Likely To HEYYEYAAEYAAAEYAEYAAHEYEEYEA"
I hope he's fucking proud of himself
He Wears Several Pairs of Goggles Under His Jacket and Sells them for drug money.
There are things he doesnt want to, doesnt like to and is uncomfortable talking about.
He might be delicious, and that's why rats like to gnaw on him and half of his previous corporeal body was eaten by them before it rotted
He may or may not no longer have ownership over his own soul. I'll bet that's delicious too.
| Completely irrelevant |
|---|
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BOTH OF MY GOLD CARTRIDGES ARE DEAD FIRST SILVER AND NOW THEM TOO MY BABIES ALL DIE Crystal is still going but what's even the use :'c |
I M Liar
Because I could
If We Tear out the Tumor,
It's Later, Never Sooner
If We Tear out the Tumor,
Its Later, Never sooner.
I didn't think it was a bad idea
That said, it was no different from the others
Except that this is now and that was then and everything
It Seems to Repeat in a Cylicial Pattern
Its Not Treason, Its No Lie
Across the floor in the hand of where we drove the drill
A cautious ear to the mouth of your confession
Think of all the things we put him through
In the face of his god, would he tell the truth?
| Status is not yet Appropriate Opening time |
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You Better Keep in Check ~ Or You'll End up a Wreck ~ And you'll never wake up Wake up |
| Status is not yet Appropriate Opening time |
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Little Angel go Away, Come again some other day The devil has my Ear today I'll never hear a word you say Promised, I would find some solace and some piece of mind Whatever, Just So Long As I Dont Feel So Desperate and Ravenous So Weak And Powerless |
| Status is not yet Appropriate Opening time |
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Tilling my Own Grave to Keep me Level |
| Status is not yet Appropriate Opening time |
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Fighting For the Smallest Goal: To Get a Little Self Control I Know How hard you Try, I Can See it in your eyes |
| Status is not yet Appropriate Opening time |
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Even the Night, They Could get Better [Bet-etet-tter] Even The Days Ain't All That bad After a Week of Fighting As more and more It Seems The Right thing |
| Yep |
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I'm flunking out, I'm flunking out, I'm gone, I'm just gone But at least I author my own disaster At least I author my own disaster |
Underneath the Surface
None of us deserve This
Though I picked the thorny path myself
I'm afraid
Afraid of where it leads
